Quick updates:

I've found a new straight man to fall in love with, and he does handstands and takes off his pants on command. What more can I ask for?

wolfgrrl's li'l bro is hotter than ever.

Jaeger is not your friend.

Being unemployed is simultaneously brilliant and a royal pain in the ass.

I finally got the last two seasons of Buffy on DVD, and I got my mom hooked on it. Yay!

Ugh... Must lie back down now...

Ooooooooohhhhhhhh....

Verticality is bad, but horizontalness is worse.

Whose bloody idea was it to drink 3 (4?) Jaegerbombs in a row last night? That man needs to be kicked in the shin.

Tbat?

Woooooohoo!

Who hasn't had a post in a year?

Who's drunk as shit right now?

Goddamn, typing is hard...

Hey look, no typos! I'm awesome!

Seriously, standing upright is hard right now...

I have to tell Paul's sister Sara that I was at Dave (the spaniard's)-from-Renfair's house tonight, and goddamn is he fucking HOT!

Bloody hell, I'm drunk...

(Isn't tbat tbe Vandy-girl mating call?)

(P.S. Don godd2mn 5y[ping is hard... don't ... I forgot what I was saying... Wheeeeee!)

My life is shit.

Also, you people post an ungodly number of LJ posts in two days.

Why yes, I am writing this at four in the morning, and yes, I do need to be up in just three hours. However, sleeping from 1 pm to 1 am today has left me with little need for sleep at the moment.

Tomorrow's going to be fun.

Current Mood: awake

I have a new roommate.

He's about the size of a nickel, he's sort of hairy, he has eight legs, and he's currently webbed himself into a little ball and firmly attached himself to my curtain.

Ick!!!!

Current Mood: distressed
Current Music: Finger Eleven, "One Thing"

My life is hectic. Fun, but hectic. I haven't updated with any sort of regularity lately, so here's the latest from the world of Josh.

The first weekend of Atlanta Ren Fest went well. I had a blast working the faire with Paul and Mike, and I'm really glad I got to spend so much time with them--I forget how great they are sometimes. We didn't meet many people this weekend, but it's only the first weekend so I'm not too worried. We got to hang out with the game-boys next door and throw knives, axes, and shuriken for free when the crowd vanished at the end of the day on Sunday, though, which was fun. Plus, I got to dress up like an elf all weekend, which was awesome. I need to buy new boots, though--my boots are cool, but look more "X2" than "LotR". Plus, they've got some really sweet boots there that are a lot lighter than mine, which would be nice.

It's funny how tired I was at the end of each day, though, considering I wasn't doing that much. Unfortunately, I don't usually sleep well in unfamiliar places--and even less so when fucking retarded roosters crow all night long. (Did I mention we're set up right next to the petting zoo? So we have random roosters and ducks wandering around, and we get to stare down the evil-looking four-horned goat in the pen across from us. I didn't know goats could have four horns--it looks cool, though. But I digress...) I woke up constantly all night long both nights we were there--except for when Mike accidentally rolled over and punched me in the face, which didn't wake me up at all for some reason--and I had a horrible dream the first night that made me wake up sobbing and searching for Maggie. I hope I get used to it eventually, though, because living in a tent is pretty cool every so often. I like the simplicity of living out of just a couple of suitcases. I'm not really such a fan of the port-a-potty, though. The quarter-operated showers were sort of cute, even if I hardly had enough room to wash and comb my hair--no wonder so many rennies have dreadlocks. Plus, I got to see a hot naked guy, and it's true what they say about black guys. Port-a-potties aside, I was extremely disappointed when Sunday evening came around and we had to go home.

I think I've decided that I'm not going to be able to work any of the festivals that will require me to be away from home all the time, though. I love the adventure of going away for a weekend, but I missed Mags waaay too much, and I know he missed me, too. Every time I'm gone for more than a day, he apparently spends the entire time either hiding under my bed or crying for me. Plus, the shower, bathroom, and cleanliness things got to me, and then there's that whole "job" thing. Hopefully I'll get to visit the boys when they go to the northern Ohio show later this summer, because they said it's a whole lot of fun, but I'm afraid I won't be able to work it since it's so far away.

In other news, I'm about two weeks away from owning my own house. This is simultaneously the most exciting and the most terrifying thing I think I've ever done. But it's a really nice house with an incredible yard, and I'm already planning so many things for it--my love for gardening, interior design, and cock are pretty much my only concessions to gayness. I'm already imagining a new deck with planting boxes for flowers, and I want a trellis somewhere with some blooming vines, and a little bridge over the stream, and some new blooming trees... Glee! I'm also sort of excited about having the extra bedroom, which I'm planning on turning into a studio--it will not become a storage room, it will not become a computer room. If anyone sees it turn into either of those things, you have my permission to punch me in the face. And if all goes as I'm hoping, Mags will be able to go out in the yard and wander, so maybe he'll work off some of that weight he's put on.

I'll probably be moving in the second week of May, but since all my weekends are tied up until mid-June, I'm going to have to be doing some late-night U-Haul trips. I know a few people who are going to help me, though, and I haven't really got that much stuff, so I don't think it'll be too bad. And then as soon as I've got stuff put away and have a free weekend, I'm totally having people over for a party. With strippers, of course. Not that Jeff or Paul will be particularly pleased with my choice of strippers, but oh well.

Oh, and by the way, none of you have set me up with any hot guys yet. I'm extremely disappointed in you all, but I know you're all looking as hard as you can.

Current Mood: I had cake for supper!
Current Music: Dolly Parton, "9 to 5" remix

I don't answer my cell phone if I don't recognize the number than shows up on the caller ID. That's why God made voice mail, right? Well, I'm going to have to learn to stop doing that. My last voice mail message is from my mortgage lady, and it's sort of a vague, "You're approved for some money" kind of message. I tried calling her back immediately--okay, seven minutes after she called--but the damn bitch didn't answer any of her phone numbers!

"Why don't you answer? You were just there!! This is the number you were just at," I said. (And by "said" I mean "screamed at the phone while hopping up and down.")

However, this is the first bit of good news I've heard from the mighty mortgage gods so far, so I danced around like a retarded, hyperactive three-year-old for a few minutes. I'm impressively calm and composed right now, though.

In other exciting news, Ren season starts this weekend. I'm going to be in Atlanta for every weekend between now and June 6th, selling elf ears and fairy porn, and molesting hot underage Ren kids with my friend Paul. Ahhhh, my parents are so proud. I also get to share a tent with the sexy Bielaczyc brothers--which might turn out to be a bit of a curse if they get into any farting wars. I swear to god, I'll kill them if they stink me out of the tent...

Current Mood: excited

Okay, I totally ganked this from theferrett, but this really needs to be shared with the world. Holy shit, I can't stop laughing...

Current Mood: amused